Spring

Spring is here. I see a little bit of color creeping in along with the sunshine. Just as we begin to admire it, the weather Gods tease us with sudden snow and thunderstorms. Much like life. Just as we begin to settle down to enjoy the calm, something comes along to rattle us and keep us on our toes.

With a plethora of issues, I am just waiting to catch a break. The past year dealt us with numerous issues concerning health, investments and toxic relationships to name a few. Sadly some of the most  enlightening lessons come after bitter experiences and when it rains, it really pours! The bright side to having so much on my plate is that I cannot afford to dwell on any one matter for too long. Everyone deals with unwelcome situations in their own way. Some cry, some vent, some shut down, some work with newfound vigor etc.  My coping mechanism has always been to compartmentalize and process my thoughts quietly on my own. When I am upset or anxious, I prefer to be by myself and immerse myself in random activities that keep me occupied and take my mind off. It is like putting on a facade which lets me deal with my affairs at my own pace without interruptions, or enquirers.

So often friends and sometimes extended family wonder if we are really that busy or if we really have that many concerns in life. After all the images on social media always paint a blissful picture. I have learnt it is better to leave it at that and there is no point in trying to convince otherwise. The only ones who get to witness me in my fervent emotional state are my parents and husband; for the rest I try to keep a poker face. As I put on my happy face to take my kid for some fun activities or get ready to enjoy a musical evening or catch a movie with husband, I let the troubles take a back seat for the moment.

This year I am trying to be more positive, more confident and more in sync with what I want. As I begin to give utmost importance to health, I am making a conscious effort to take better charge of my affairs and distance myself from pernicious situations and people. Meanwhile I am still learning to strike a balance between:

  • being polite and firm
  • accommodating and assertive
  • Oats and Lays Masala flavor/Maggie (this one needs a lot of work)

Anyways back to spring. It is considered a hopeful time of the year – new beginnings, new ventures. So we are busy trying our amateurish best to add some cozy yard/deck furnishings. I am appreciating the tiny flowers sprouting on my beautiful trees while the little one insists I hang her heavily glued bird seeder on the tree. As for the snow and rain, I guess there is nothing much one can do except get a big red umbrella and wait for a rainbow!